Shake the Uncertainty: The Journey Back to Trusting Yourself
When you’ve lived in survival mode for a long time, it rewires more than your nervous system. It reshapes how you see yourself. You may come to believe that your needs don’t matter, your feelings aren’t valid, and your decisions aren’t safe to make. Over time, self-trust erodes, and with it, your ability to move confidently in the world.
This loss of trust shows up in subtle but exhausting ways. You might feel paralyzed by even small decisions, like choosing what to eat or whether to rest. Bigger decisions like relationships, career changes, or speaking your truth can feel incredibly overwhelming, and almost impossible. The stress and anxiety that surface aren’t proof that you’re incapable... They’re signals of outdated patterns still firing in your system.
The good news: your self-trust can be rebuilt.
The first step is curiosity. Notice when stress spikes in decision-making. Ask yourself: Am I stressed because this choice is unsafe? Or am I stressed because my nervous system has been trained to believe it’s unsafe? That distinction matters because oftentimes, we’re reacting to old wiring, not the present moment.
Next, experiment with affirmations. Not the kind pulled from a book, but ones you create in real time that are directly relevant to the moment. When the anxiety rises, pause and speak directly to yourself: I am safe to (your unique decision). I am allowed to (your specific choice). I don’t have to abandon myself in (insert outdated beliefs). Over time, these in-the-moment affirmations help to re-regulate your nervous system while reinforcing your remembered self… The part of you that knows you are worthy of trust.
Gradually then, you’ll develop the ability to hold both: the fear of making the “wrong” choice, and the deeper knowing that you can trust yourself to choose what is best for you. This dual awareness is powerful. It allows you to acknowledge the anxiety without obeying it, and instead act from a place of honesty.
Just remember, self-trust isn’t rebuilt overnight. But each time you affirm your truth and follow through, you strengthen the bridge back to yourself. Eventually, choosing for yourself stops feeling like defiance and starts feeling like freedom.
Practical Takeaway: This week, analyze one decision, big or small, and notice what happens in your body when you approach it. If anxiety arises, pause and create your own affirmation in the moment. Write it down. Speak it out loud. Just create an honest statement… Then, act on it. Each repetition builds the muscle of self-trust.
If This Resonated
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Here’s to finally shaking the uncertainty of survival mode and leaning into the freedom, regulation, and peace of your remembered self 😌
~ Austen 🫶🏼
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