Step Out of Your Comfort Zone and Rediscover Who You Are
Have you ever had a moment where you questioned something as simple as your favorite music… or the way you walk into a room? It might seem trivial, until you realize how much of you was shaped by survival.
Trauma and conditioning don’t just change how we feel, they change how we act, connect, express, and even choose. We adapt. We filter. We fit in to stay safe. And then one day, the version of us we’ve been carrying no longer fits. Not because we’ve done something wrong… But because the truth has been quietly waiting beneath the surface, asking us to remember it.
The Illusion of Safety in Familiarity
Routines can bring us comfort. Predictability can make us feel safe. But not all that is familiar is honest.
Sometimes, the patterns we cling to are the very things that keep us from expressing what wants to be seen. Maybe it’s skipping out on social events out of fear of judgment… Or clinging to productivity because rest feels too vulnerable… Or constantly shrinking yourself because somewhere along the way, you were made to believe that your feelings were “too much.”
These behaviors, these beliefs, they may have kept you safe once. But now, are they keeping you, you?
Your Comfort Zone Was Built to Protect You
But it wasn’t built to free you. Our subconscious holds onto old stories tightly, and it does so without asking if they’re still true. That’s how you can wake up years later and realize your life doesn’t feel like it belongs to you.
And yet, that realization? It’s the beginning of the breakthrough.
I’ve been there. There was a time when I rarely went out in public. Social anxiety ruled my life. I filtered everything, from how I spoke to what I wore. My body was yearning to be honest… but the fear of judgment was louder.
So what changed? I stopped avoiding the discomfort and started getting curious about it.
Curiosity Is the Bridge Between the Familiar and the Free
When we ask why something makes us feel a certain way, we begin to uncover what’s been living underneath the surface.
Here’s what that can look like:
“I feel anxious about going to this gathering.”
“Where is that anxiety coming from?”
“Is it fear of judgment? A story I carry about being unwanted?”
“Is that story true? Or is it familiar?”
This kind of honest, embodied inquiry allows us to reconnect to the deep intuitive part of ourselves, the part that knows, without justification, what is true.
Moving Beyond the Comfort Zone, One Step At a Time
Once you’ve uncovered the stories keeping you small, the next step is to stretch gently beyond them. This doesn’t mean bulldozing your boundaries. It means offering yourself small, brave acts of expansion:
Say yes to a social outing you’d normally avoid (if your body feels ready).
Try listening to a new genre of music and noticing how it makes you feel.
Express a piece of your truth, even if your voice shakes a little.
The goal isn’t perfection. It’s presence. Every “nope, that’s not me” is just as valuable as every “yes, this feels right.” Both are part of your remembering.
Redefining the Journey
It’s easy to feel like something’s wrong when we don’t automatically know who we are. But let me offer you this:
What if the journey of not knowing isn’t a burden, but a sacred invitation?
Look, not everyone gets the chance to consciously choose who they become. But you do. And when you say yes to that process, when you step beyond what’s familiar to find what’s real, you don’t just “find yourself.” You create yourself. Truthfully. Intentionally. Honestly.
And that’s a kind of freedom that can never be taken away.
Want to explore this deeper?
This week’s episode of the podcast, Ride Your Tide, is all about this very topic, how stepping out of your comfort zone is often the first step in coming home to yourself. You can find the link to episode #046 below, and you can tune in wherever you listen to podcasts.
As always, sending you all my love,
~ Austen 🫶🏼
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